I hate living with this illness . I did this to myself thinking stupidity one day I would just stop smoking but I didn’t know it was a progressive disease and could pop up later even if you did stop (so stupid of me thinking this ) I lived a fun life and did most things right besides smoking . I didn’t do drugs but honestly that probably would have been better I could of OD and died easily or I could have gotten clean with no illness that I’m stuck with and had a chance to live better without past repercussions. I’m the one to blame but I wish they never sold cigarettes, they don’t allow heroin to be sold because it kills people. This illness is a long battle , that gets worse and worse and no one can help . I feel the inhalers work better for people with asthma, I don’t think treatment for us really helps all that much . I keep hearing “you can live 20 years “ and honestly that doesn’t make me feel good because It means 20 years gasping for air and being scared when I can’t breathe and going to the hospital and getting a nebulizer treatment that doesn’t really help and no one can help .
And it’s a freighting thing to see and scares peoplele cause they can’t help and they look away when they walk past the er room .
I’m sorry it’s just how I feel . I made a huge mistake.
💕🙏if you’re religious please pray for me maybe that will help me