Yesterday I read my email and found this article. https://themighty.com/2017/10/not-judging-myself-f...
From the article I like the idea of reframing how we view ourself. I also like the idea of writing our own story and be the writer of our own life. It's liberating. One thing that stucked in my head: Am I seeing myself today as someone physically ill?
Having bronchiectasis, I cough mucus everyday. That's my new normal. I have to exercise everyday, consume healthy food and maintain my thoughts.
I have been torn lately about whether I should continue my study in medical school or not. Continuing means I have to take clerckship program and work in hospital from June 2018 - 2020 in order to get MD. Not continuing means that I completed my pre-clinic study on April 2018 and stop.
I was thinking and self-talking, "Well, germs are everywhere. Not working in hospital doesn't guarantee myself that I will not get exacerbation. Working in hospital is possible. You see your online friend with bronch can be a respiratory therapist for 23 years." "You know that some of the doctor in clerckship are a little bit hard to the students, especially with the sloppy students. Stress in there is normal and you just have to study and try."
Again, like many opportunities that I got before, allows me to do a self reflection and ask myself about "how do you want to live your life?" I am so thankful that even in the hard times, I still have chance to make decision.
I want to write my own story. If medical school is something that I really really want to do, I will do it with everything I got. If medical school is not something that I really want to do in this life, then do other things that make you proud of yourself.